I don’t like to acknowledge that there can be good things that come from a bad boss because my fear is that we’ll skip the nuance and take this as licentiousness, as if poor leadership weren’t the problem and fault just your attitude. THAT feels a little “victim-blamey.” Now I know, I know all the…
I was vulnerable and honest in a meeting – and I was met with deafening silence… As much fun as spreadsheets and metrics are, one of my great joys is bringing on a new cohort of interns and investing in their soft skills development. Recently, I got a ping from one of our continuing interns,…
I am a HIGHLY productive person. I encourage people who want work/life balance, but I am not among them. I LOVE working and I want to be working from the moment my brain wakes up to the moment it falls asleep (with breaks throughout for parenting, adventuring, and whatnot, sure) but I love working. But…
A lot of leaders scoff when I talk about psychological safety, because they got a false idea of what that meant from an abundance of influencers misusing the buzzword. They worry that if they try to rollout psychological safety (”and how do you even do that,” they wonder) their team will be crying about safety…
Hey. As I sit down to write you – me – a letter, I anticipate this is going to start awkward and get better as we go. That’s the way it always works, right? Starts awkward, gets better. Remember that. Here we go. I’m standing 10 years in the future and we both know –…
Standing up at the front of the room, the leader feels great during the meeting. They are on point, speaking with clarity, passion, and enthusiasm as they lay out the action plan for the quarter. Wrapping up, they take a deep breath and ask for input, scanning the room for objections. Everyone nods politely. No…
(originally posted in an edited form on A Life Overseas) “It’s not fair,” I whined in the backseat of the car, my sister next to me. “It’s not fair,” I moped from the end of the line. “It’s not fair,” I mourned, overlooked for a role I wanted. “It’s not fair,” I gasped, taking the fall. “It’s not fair,”…
It is a cultural value that elevates objectivity over subjectivity. I distinctly remember people speaking poorly of soft sciences because they lacked the quantifiable objectivity of hard sciences, real sciences. Hard and soft skills were painted with the same brush. Disdain offered for the soft skills while priority was given to “real” skills. But more…
“And then after my bath, you commanded me to give you a kiss.” My three-year-old’s innocent statement sent a jolt through me. “Command” wasn’t a “bad” word in our house, but in that context, it held a power dynamic neither of us wanted. This wasn’t the first time this seemingly harmless word took an unexpected…
Dear Friend, I’m so sorry I didn’t write you sooner. In the summer of 2020, I was fired from my life’s work, while we were at a counseling center in Fresno. I remember knowing it was coming. I remember the counselors telling me that would be illogical, irrational, unthinkable. They were wrong. Within 30 seconds…